Date: Wed, 6 Nov 1996 23:35:06 -0500 Subject: Headlines of the Apocalypse Sharon Zohar sends this, noting, "Got this from a friend I thought had fallen off the face of the earth. Nice way to let me know he was still alive, wasn't it? Enjoy..." =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= When the end of the world arrives, how will the media report it? USA Today: WE'RE DEAD The Wall Street Journal: DOW JONES PLUMMETS AS WORLD ENDS National Enquirer: O.J. AND NICOLE, TOGETHER AGAIN Playboy: GIRLS OF THE APOCALYPSE Microsoft Systems Journal: APPLE LOSES MARKET SHARE Victoria's Secret Catalog: OUR FINAL SALE Sports Illustrated: GAME OVER Wired: THE LAST NEW THING Rolling Stone: THE GRATEFUL DEAD REUNION TOUR Readers Digest: 'BYE Discover Magazine: HOW WILL THE EXTINCTION OF ALL LIFE AS WE KNOW IT AFFECT THE WAY WE VIEW THE COSMOS? TV Guide: DEATH AND DAMNATION: NIELSON RATINGS SOAR! Lady's Home Journal: LOSE 10 LBS BY JUDGEMENT DAY WITH OUR NEW "ARMAGEDDON" DIET! America Online: SYSTEM TEMPORARILY DOWN.TRY CALLING BACK IN 15 MINUTES. Inc. magazine: TEN WAYS YOU CAN PROFIT FROM THE APOCALYPSE Microsoft's Web Site: IF YOU DIDN'T EXPERIENCE THE RAPTURE, DOWNLOAD SOFTWARE PATCH RAPT777.EXE. Sun: ARMAGEDDON TOLERANT SOFTWARE NOW AVAILABLE! ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ PackyHumor: some idiotic, inane or otherwise confusing mail that packy, for no discernable reason, chooses to inflict on his friends. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ What kind of name is 'Packy'? Visit 'www.dardan.com/packynet' to find out!