Mom-Filtered(tm) for your reading enjoyment.
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T H E T O P F I V E L I S T
Where's that confounded bridge?
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The Top 11 Signs Your Divorce Isn't Going Well
[ The Top 5 List www.topfive.com ]
[ Copyright 2000 by Chris White ]
11> Since his recent divorce, your lawyer has been using his car
for an office.
10> Your spouse's lawyer has suddenly taken to lighting his cigarettes with twenties.
9> The judge is seriously considering your spouse's request for custody of your immortal soul.
8> Your spouse's attorney is seeking the death penalty.
7> Your mother's name appears on your wife's witness list.
6> Your portion of the settlement so far: The Commodore 64, the Chia pets and the Wham! CD collection.
5> Jerry Springer cancelled your appearance, citing "Safety Concerns."
4> You discover that Judge Jacques' last name is actually *not* pronounced "Jack-ass."
3> In her search for hidden assets, your wife hires a proctologist.
2> Your half of the dog arrives postage due.
and Topfive.com's Number 1 Sign Your Divorce Isn't Going Well...
1> Johnnie Cochran's closing argument: "If dad goes gay, he's got to pay!"
[ The Top 5 List www.topfive.com ]
[ Copyright 2000 by Chris White ]
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Rumination of the Day
The former Soviet Union has a state of Georgia like the USA
does. I wonder if they also made a movie called,
"Deliverance," and, if they did, did they have an actor
who's line was, "Squeal like a pig, Comrade! Squeal like the
Capitalist Pig you are!!" I would sure hope so.
(Billy Zarevich)