Thanks to Sharon Zohar and Cheryl Torrantor for helping me clean this one up, and apologies to our Goyim subscribers who may not get all these references...
Now buzzword-compliant!
The Top 11 Differences in Campaigning with a Jewish Running Mate
[ The Top 5 List www.topfive.com ]
[ Copyright 2000 by Chris White ]
| 11 - | The convention crowd waits to cheer your nomination until after you step on a glass. |
| 10 - | New campaign slogan: "Next year in Washington!" |
| 9 - | Two sets of dishes is a great way to double your take at those $1000/plate dinners. |
| 8 - | During his campaign appearances he insists that there be a second podium on stage for Elijah. |
| 7 - | War room staffers hard at work preparing to respond to any personal shmear campaigns. |
| 6 - | There goes $250,000 in campaign funds to buy a right-to-left TelePrompter. |
| 5 - | Gefilte breath will even keep Sam Donaldson at bay. |
| 4 - | You can forget about pork-barrel politics. |
| 3 - | All of his aides keep shaking their heads and asking why he couldn't be on a ticket with a nice doctor or lawyer instead. |
| 2 - | After a hard day on the trail, kickin' back with some Manischewitz shooters. |
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and Topfive.com's Number 1 Difference in Campaigning with a Jewish Running Mate... | |
| 1 - | Goodbye, Bubba -- Hello, Bubbeleh! |
If I had an infinite number of monkeys on an infinite number of typewriters, I sure wouldn't waste them on that Shakespeare idea. I'd use them to come up with a really slick Rumination -- kind of like this one, but more monkey-like.
(Dan Thompson)
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