Subject: Nine ways NOT to start your police report
Date: Fri, Oct 6 2000 00:00:02 EDT

Nine ways NOT to start your police report

(From American Police Beat, a magazine for cops)

  1. - It was the best of times, it was the worst of times ...
  2. - The names contained in this report have been changed to protect the innocent ...
  3. - The mayor then made an illegal left hand turn onto Mulraney at which point I opened fire ...
  4. - Before I get into the details, I've got a few "shout-outs" for my homeys in the command staff ...
  5. - It was so dark and wet that night you could almost eat the mist. The radio call penetrated the eerie silence with such piercing intensity that for a moment, I was sure I'd lost my mind ...
  6. - Got call. Responded. Arrested bad guy. The end.
  7. - Mye pertnar an eye wher on petrol wen we seen a man act suspishushly...
  8. - The suspect then tried to assualt me by repeatedly slamming his face into my fist ...
  9. - A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away ...
Received from Mike Sutherlin.

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